fire.

(Bepp)

Lois smiled sheepishly over the smoldering ruins of their kitchen counter. She waved towards the stack of cookbooks on the kitchen table. At the top of the pile lay a bright yellow 'Cooking for Dummies' book subtitled '101 Things To Cook In a Microwave'.

"Guess we won't be needing this one," she grinned.

"Lois, how does this sound? I cook, you watch and learn."

Lois sighed. "Fine, but next time it's hands-on, buddy."

"Hands on what?" he leered, cocking an eyebrow at her.

She swatted at him. "Concentrate on cooking."

"Fine. Turn around and close your eyes."

"What? How am I supposed to watch and learn if I can't *watch* you?" she demanded.

"I'm making my mom's secret fudge recipe...I can't just give it away."

(AlienDove)

Clark turned her around to face the sink and flew into the living room at super speed to retrieve his latest issue of “Modern Gourmet”. He
returned in a whoosh, and flipped to the article on home-made fudge.

Lois huffed impatiently. "Well!? Can I turn around yet!?"

"Not yet!", Clark replied, speed-reading through the ingredients and cooking instructions. Once he committed it to memory, he tossed the
magazine into the trash bin and turned Lois around again.

"Now you can watch an expert at work," he said with a grin.

"Ha ha, funny boy. What should I do to help?"

"Grab me that Hershey’s syrup, would ya?"

Lois, now happy to be involved in the cooking, rushed to get the syrup. Unfortunately, there was still egg yolk on the floor where she
had dropped the obligatory egg.

Clark caught Lois as her feet flew out from under her. However, he couldn't save his face from the chocolatey mess she had accidentally imposed upon it.

They collapsed in a fit of laughter. "Oh, oops....I'm sorry....," Lois said. "But actually...it's not a bad look for you!"

"Oh, really?", said Clark. "Well, lets just see how it looks on you!" With that he lunged forward and planted a wet one on her lips.

Lois giggled. "Mmm, not bad," she murmured, and closed in for seconds.

But then...."Ding Dong!"

Lois and Clark reluctantly parted lips and sighed. "Must be Jimmy," they said in unison.

(SUPERfan)

Lois walked towards the door, opened it, and said, "Hi, Jimmy."

"How'd you know it was me? I didn't call or anything! Lois, have you been talking with Star again?" Jimmy asked.

"Jimmy," Lois said impatiently, "I assume you came over for a reason. It *is* mine and Clark's day off."

Jimmy started to explain and got about halfway through a word before he noticed the chocolate. "Lois, what is that stuff?"

Lois licked her finger. "Chocolate, of course. What does it look like?"

"Hmmm, personally I liked your cucumber oil better than the smell of chocolate..." Jimmy started.

"Hey, Jimmy," interrupted Clark. He had obviously done some super cleaning on himself seeing that all the chocolate had miraculously
disappeared from his face.

Clark was carrying a glass of orange juice. "Here you go, honey. It's freshly squeezed," he said, handing Lois the glass.

"Now, Jimmy, what brings you here today?" Clark asked.

"Well --"

(AlienDove)

"OK, you're NEVER gonna believe this guys!" Jimmy exclaimed excitedly.

"Try me," Lois said with a smirk.

"Forty-year-old senator died about an hour ago in his bathtub...ask me how."

"OK, I'll bite," Clark said. "How?"

"He choked to death. Evidently on some rotten tomatoes! Even the coroner doesn't know what to make of it yet, but the police suspect
foul play."

"Well, I'd say so!", Lois said. "How many men eat rotten tomatoes in a bathtub right before they die?"

"Wow. It IS all weird in Metropolis!" Clark exclaimed.

"Well, I gotta go guys, Chief just beeped me. Probably some emergency, like a shortage of corned beef on rye," Jimmy said with a
smirk. "See ya later."

"Bye, Jimmy!" Lois and Clark replied in unison as they closed the door.

"Now, where were we?", asked Lois.

"Well," said Clark, "I think we were just starting on, mmm, dessert...."

"Oh yeah," said Lois. "Now, that, I can handle..."

They collapsed on the couch and were starting to enjoy themselves, when the doorbell rang. AGAIN. "Your turn to get it this time," Lois said with a disappointed sigh.

Clark hoisted himself off the couch and walked to the door. He opened it and was startled to see none other than.....

(Bep)

Jimmy. Again.

"Jimmy! Great to see you again. Any news?..." Clark inquired unenthusiastically.

Jimmy, as usual, was oblivious.

“They found the senator’s wife!”

"Oh, really? How'd she take the news?"

"No, no, you don't get it; they found her dead too! And get this...they killed her vampire-style, with a sharpened spatula tip
through the heart!"

"Cooks these days," Clark muttered under his breath. "That's going to make a really, uh, interesting story, Jimmy. Thanks for letting
us know about it!" Clark closed the door before Jimmy could think of anything else to add.

Clark returned to the living room to find Lois busy on the phone. "Who is it?" he asked quietly.

She mouthed something to him.

"Who?"

"Perry... some superhearing you've got there, honey," she grinned. "Yes, we'll be there, Chief," she said as she hung up the phone.

(SUPERfan)

"Perry says we have to come in?" Clark asked.

"Yes," Lois sighed. "Can you think of a way to get out of it? I was enjoying my cooking lesson."

"Well.... maybe I could --" Clark started.

Riiiiinnnnnnnng riiiiiiinnnnnggggg!

"Hello?"

"Hi again Chief!" Clark said. "What? No.... you weren't interrupting-" Lois grabbed the phone away.

"Chief... you *were* interrupting... what?... Um, you were interrupting, uh..."

"LO-IS! Don't make him think --" Clark said.

"Yeah, that's -- What?... We can stay home? You'll have someone else handle it? Thanks, Chief!" Lois grinned as she hung up the phone.
"NOW that's how you get out of stuff!"

"Lois! He thinks that --" Clark started.

"Oh, who cares what he thinks? Let's get back to the kitchen now!" Lois interrupted as she pulled Clark towards the kitchen. "All right... teach me to use this stuff. What is this???"

"*That* is an egg slicer! Wait... that was on the oven. Why isn't it hot? Lois... the fudge won't cook if you don't turn on the oven!!!"

"Oh, Clark! Don't cry over spilt milk! Wait - I didn't spill any yet did I?" she grinned as she turned on the oven.

(AlienDove)

"OK, Lois, now you can preheat the oven to 350.", Clark said.

"Oven preheated. Check."

“Now get the tin foil out of that drawer over there..."

“Over where?”

"Over there. Under the sink."

"Oh, OK, got it."

"Um, it said... I mean, Mom said to cover the fudge with tin foil when it's done, so that'll come in handy later," Clark said. "Just leave
there on the bread board."

Lois pulled out an object from drawer and fiddled around with it. It was one of those corkscrews that looked like a person... Lois
positioned the "arms" vertically and exclaimed "Look Clark, it's SUPERMAN!", as she "flew" the corkscrew around the kitchen, waving it
over her head.

Clark chuckled. Had Lois had just a *bit* too much chocolate syrup today?
"No," he said, "*I'm* Superman!" And with that he spun into the red and blue suit. He folded his arms across his chest and grinned.

Lois giggled. "You know, I never get tired of watching you do that."

(Bep)

Lois traced the S on his chest with a finger and smiled up at him. Clark responded with a grin of his own and pulled her closer,
leaning down to kiss her gently. Her arms had circled his waist and she had opened her mouth to him, deepening the kiss when she felt him tense and pull away slightly.

The look on his face said it all. "Go," she said, waving him off with attempted cheerfulness. Seeing him hesitate, she smiled a little and gave him a peck on the cheek. "The sooner you take care of whatever it is, the sooner we can get back to cooking...or whatever we were doing. So shoo!"

"Bye. And *don't* touch anything." Clark warned. He flew off with a whoosh, and Lois was left standing alone in the middle of the kitchen. The spice rack hanging by what was left of the microwave caught her eye. She wandered over and picked up a bottle at random, shaking a little of it out onto her hand. She sniffed it hesitantly before tasting it. Not too bad really...kind of herby, she thought, reaching for another one. She wasn't so cautious with this one, and tasted some right away.

"Whoa!" The bottle fell to the floor with a clatter. She ran over to the sink, turned on the faucet and stuck her mouth under the
wonderfully cold stream of water. Lois eyed the spice rack warily from a distance, but "curiosity killed the cat," she sighed. "Just don't taste anything, girl." Stepping over the mess of broken glass and red powder on the tile floor, she reached for another bottle. 'Parsnips,' read the label. "What the hell is a parsnip?" she wondered aloud.

"It's a vegetable, from the carrot family, actually. It has large pinnate leaves and yellow flowers, and is native to Europe."

She glared at Clark over her shoulder, putting one hand over her pounding heart. "What did you do as a child? Sit around and memorize the dictionary? And you scared me half to death," she said testily.

Clark looked from her flushed and still-damp face to the mess on the floor. "Had a run-in with the bottle of paprika, did we?" He grinned.
"So, Lois, wanna get back to that cooking lesson?" he smiled, turning back towards the oven.

She smiled wickedly, coming up behind him and wrapping her arms around his neck. "I say there are better things we could do in the
kitchen besides cooking."

fade to black...

THE END
--------------------------------------------------------

Thanks to everyone who provided that story for us; it was great! And don't forget to send in your *own* stories for everybody to see in the newsletter!
Later!
-Rachel :)